Thursday, January 14, 2010

Whoa, what a ride!

So, the past 4 months have definitely been a challenge.  When your job is not going well, it affects your entire life surrounding you.  I kept trying to remember that Jesus never left me when I was feeling so beat down and defeated.  I prayed many days for endurance and contentment.  After many days of praying and in my moments of not being able to pray my mom fervently prayed for me many times a day as well as many others.  For that, I am so grateful!  Our church is doing a 21 day fast and I started mine on Saturday.  On my list of things to see God change was of course my job.  I prayed for a miracle and that is just what He did.  By Tuesday I quit the job from "the dark place" and was able to have a second chance and a second perspective on how well other jobs I have had really are.  I am also realizing that no job comes without it's rough days.  I am definitely now praying for contentment in my job and to just rely on the Lord even if it turns out to be a second by second situation.  Which in most cases in my life when I am struggling, it seems second by second is too long.  :)  But, all in all, GOD is ALWAYS Faithful!  ALWAYS!

I would love to say I am welcoming 2010 with a new perspective and I am not sad at all to say goodbye to 2009.  With 2009 came many rough spots and the healing of a broken heart.  Though my heart is still a little sad, I am definitely seeing the Lord's hand in His decision.  In November I made a very poor choice that was a rude awakening for me.  I look back just a few months later to see how the Lord was giving me a second chance to turn things around.  I have not desired a relationship with the Lord for the past several months.  I honestly felt abandoned and angry.  Well, November 13th was the day all of that nonsense changed for me.  I have learned that I need accountability.  I need someone to walk along side of me and guide me in a relationship with the Lord and to tell me His truths that I so often don't believe.  Why is it that I will believe the enemies lies over our HOLY and Precious Heavenly Father?  My battle is definitely in my mind.  And it is definitely a spiritual battle that is raging in and around me all the time.  That is why it is so important to stay in direct contact with our Jesus.

I started reading a book called, "I'm Not Good Enough...and Other Lies Women Tell Themselves" by Sharon Jaynes.  Though I am taking my sweet time reading it, it is a FANTASTIC book!  It is filled with such wonderful scriptures and God's truth, just what I need.

I would love to hear of what your 2010 spiritual goals are, please let me know!  Here are mine:
  • Find contentment in:
    • My career
    • My singleness
  • Seek the Lord daily even when I don't feel like it
  • To meet Jesus in a way I never have before
  • To experience a true Spiritual Awakening
  • To start living the Fruits of the Spirit
2 Chronicles 7:14
"If my people who are called by my name, will humble themselves and pray and seek my face and turn from their wicked ways, then will I hear from heaven and will forgive their sin and heal their land."

1 John 5:14,15
"This is the confidence we have in approaching God: that if we ask anything according to his will, he hears us.  And if we know that he hears us-whatever we ask-we know that we have what we asked of him."

I look forward to seeing more of the positive things the Lord will do in my life in 2010!  I am hopeful to be more faithful at blogging too...we will see.  :)